I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize