I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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