i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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