But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
