It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
