the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
True strength comes from lack of pants
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize