We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
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Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
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SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
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