if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
