how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
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