ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
