I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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