Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
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