You're completely useless in the revolution.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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