Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
