It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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