so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
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He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
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I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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