It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
