that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Randomize
