Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
