So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize