i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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