508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
