There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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