he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
