so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
