I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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