he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
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