Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
