i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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