i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
