the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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