New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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