i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
