WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
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