We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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