Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Randomize
