so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize