so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
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