WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
