You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
