last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
