Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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