hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize