That's when you crack a 10am beer
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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