yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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