It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
