therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I have aggressive nipples.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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