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• (585): View more from New York

  Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.

  (1-937): View more from Ohio

  it's love

  Fav 16 5008 1077

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her

  Fav 59 975 3619

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• (509): View more from Washington

  Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint

  Fav 10 1598 5017

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.

  Fav 24 8034 1437

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• (845): View more from New York

  I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass

  Fav 8 2126 905

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• (754): View more from Florida

  Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing

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• (904): View more from Florida

  He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  Relax

  (1-740): View more from Ohio

  It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.

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