I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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