this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize